I may not have told you...I am not sure whether it matters to you or not, but...well...I am twenty-six years old. That may mean nothing to anyone. In Los Angeles it means I am over the hill unless I look very young (I do). In the rest of my life it means that I all my closest friends are getting married this summer. That is where I have been in June.
(oh. and i did two films too!)
But the weddings were amazing. My friends from home (Northern California) are amazing. I have yet to find as good of friends as the ones I made growing up, (except my current roommate and my best pal from college, Skip).
My last day of "wedding vacation" Michael Jackson died, and I just about had a huge panic attack. This was the day I was going to be driving back to smelly old Los Angeles from very close to San Francisco, and I was losing it. Here is a little of my breakdown:
What am I doing with my life?
Why would I leave this area for anything?
I already miss my parents and they are getting older and I love them and I was blessed with such a wonderful family and friends in the Bay Area, why would I leave them?
Am I a masochist?
Is my boyfriend right for me?
Did I do everything right for Steph's wedding? Was I there for her? Did I screw up anything?
Is Barbara mad at me for not getting her in time to bustle the dress?
MICHAEL!!! MICHAEL!!! My childhood is crumbling before me!
This is a very weird transitioning period for me.
What if I moved back to San Francisco and became a teacher and lived in the city?
Man. How the HELL am I going to do this??
Maybe I should see a therapist...thoughts?